Decking the Halls and Being Merry

Swapping cookies at this year's Cookie Bake and Swap

The CUTEST cookie jar I won as a door prize at a nurses' night out

I didn't have a candle that fit in the glass centerpiece...so why not some peppermints? ;)

Christmas shopping trip--taking a break for some lunch at Panera!


Silent night-- no words needed.

Christmas shopping out of town is more fun when you can stay at a hotel afterwards.

The annual cookie baking bonanza and swap

My rescued Christmas tree and my Advent "wreath" on the table

Tired

The end of this week finds me exhausted.

Overwhelmed at work from too much to do and too few nurses to do it.

Frustrated with noisy highschoolers at CCD class this week who seem oblivious of the fact that there is a God who wants to know them personally. Frustrated that I lost my patience (and temper!) with them.

Discouraged from mistakes in my solos during choir practice. Too tired to sing.

Nameless emotions from two doctor visits in one week. Abnormal labs. Again. Specialists. Again. Fighting to trust. Again.

I'm tired.

Tomorrow is the fourth week of Advent. And though I don't feel as though I've grown in the way I wanted to during this season before Christmas, I'm comforted by thoughts of Mary during that first advent before Christ's birth...

She was familiar with waiting. The unknown. The struggle for trust and faith.

She was tired.

She traveled a long journey.

But she continued to focus on the gift of Christ within her.

I see her example. I want to follow it as the Magi followed the star.

Despite everything...because of everything...focus on Him. Maybe this what it means to live Advent.

Wisdom for Wednesdays

"Take time to be aware that in the very midst of our busy preparations for the
celebration of Christ’s birth in ancient Bethlehem, Christ is reborn in the
Bethlehems of our homes and daily lives. Take time, slow down, be still, be
awake to the Divine Mystery that looks so common and so ordinary yet is
wondrously present.

"An old abbot was fond of saying, ‘The devil
is always the most active on the highest feast days.’

"The supreme trick of Old Scratch is to have
us so busy decorating, preparing food, practicing music and cleaning in
preparation for the feast of Christmas that we actually miss the coming of
Christ. Hurt feelings, anger, impatience, injured egos—the list of clouds that
busyness creates to blind us to the birth can be long, but it is familiar to us
all."

-Edward Hays, A Pilgrim’s Almanac

The (Im)Perfect Christmas

If you know me well (…or actually if you know me at all), you know I love holidays. I love decorating, cooking, hosting, and anything festive that coordinates with a holiday. I drink tea in pink mugs for Valentine’s day and make red-white-blue desserts in July and read Christmas stories in December. Oh yes, I celebrate holidays with the best of ‘em.

So don’t think me a Scrooge when I say the commercials on TV this year are driving me crazy! Every other commercial teaches us about the ‘perfect’ Christmas. First, everything must look perfect—clothing, smiles, food, families, homes—with the assumption that perfect things make a perfect holiday. Secondly, the preparation for a perfect Christmas includes buying, buying, and more buying—the more expensive the item, the more you love that person.

The perfect Christmas, right?

I don’t think so.

The only perfect Christmas I know of…was the first one two thousand years ago.

When nothing about it looked perfect… a full inn, an uncomfortable stable, a tiring journey.

Instead of elaborate, it was simple.

Instead of noise and hurry, there was silence and stillness.

Instead of extravagance, there was humility.

Sorry, media. The perfect Christmas looks a little different than you thought. It’s not about making the yummiest cookies, sending the most cards, or even giving the best gifts.

It’s not about stuff. It’s about souls. Salvation. The ultimate gift from the only One who is perfect. It’s about preparing our hearts to give Him even more room than we have before.

Happy Advent, sweet friends. May you have an imperfect Christmas season that leads you closer to our perfect God.

Wisdom for Wednesdays

"...Hear the words again, fear not and know that God is near

For the God who spoke is speaking still

And the God who came still comes

And the miracle that happened still happens in the heart that will believe

And receive the miracle of Christmas."

-lyrics from The Miracle of Christmas, by Steven Curtis Chapman

Holy Mysteries

The wind howled angrily outside the century-old country church. The thick rain pounded the parking lot.

But I was safe inside as I closed the door behind me.

I walked through the dark church to the front, familiar steps from years gone by. I paused at the step before the altar and gently sank to the floor. I slipped off my shoes, for this was a holy place.

And I sat at the feet of my Jesus.

Darkness. Except for the light of the small red sanctuary lamp. The flicker that says He’s here. He’s waiting. Just for me.

Quiet. Stillness.

Mystery.

I had unspoken thoughts and emotions on my heart, but no words. So I hoped that my soul would speak to Him when my mind could not.

It wasn’t the first time I had sat in this spot, that I had brought Him my uncertainty and fear, my hope, my awe and wonder. The past memories whispered in hushed tones, reminding me of the prayers I’d prayed in this very spot over the years, some with answers manifested and some with answers still unknown to me but known in heaven.

How many before me have knelt here in this hundred-year-old place of worship?

How many have sat here at Jesus’ feet in those hundred years, offering hearts and receiving graces?

Beautiful faith. Handed down from generation to generation. Seasons change. Years pass. But He is always there. The red glow beckons us to His feet. He is there, waiting with love and mercy and grace and healing. The Ancient One from Abraham’s time; the same God yesterday, today, and forever.

Unchanging.

Life is Beautiful...

-sitting with the choir members once again. So happy to be back with these dear people, my incredible uncle, and the beauty of music ministry.

-spending a night at my parents, eating popcorn and watching "The Middle." That show is too funny (and the middle child is way too much like me at that age! Braces on her teeth, nerdy, and dramatic!)

-laughing with each other at work when the stress levels start to rise.

-finding a bloom on the clematis vine during the month that my grandma died five years ago (one of her favorite flowers!)

-singing way too loud with A. and the radio on a late-night drive back from our Wisconsin trip.

-with the sentimental comfort and joy of a Christmas fiction novella.

-watching little nephew L. walk around with a grin on his face and my (knockoff) Ugg boots on his feet

-having a truly understanding sister-heart on the other end of the phone line when I needed someone to cry talk to.

-working out with my girlfriends on Monday nights, laughing and whining and sweating and talking all at the same time.

-remembering how rewarding it sometimes feels to get down on your hands and knees and mop a floor (but that feeling will last awhile; no desire to mop again anytime soon).

-beginning a new year in the Church as the Advent season arrives. Preparing, worshipping, believing, and hoping with the other members of the Body.

-counting the haves when I’m tempted to count the have-nots. Choosing to trust in the unseen and knowing that He sees all.